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Monday, 27 July 2015

now JeremyCorbyn's come out,  everyone'll be jumpin' on the banned-wagon

OFFICIAL :  Y'see. Koo,  Corbyn has served as a very useful benchmark.

                          Now, because of Jeremy, we know exactly what a Marxist
                          is made up   of  .  
   KOO :         Seems to me   it's merely a prescription for further proscription.
                          Just gives you the material to harass and intimidate even more
                          people than previously.
OFFICIAL : !Hmmm .. .   Still, it's good to know who fits the Marxist profile 
                         and who doesn't ..    Oh, !don't give me that look, Koo !
                           You know as well as I  we're talking minority here.
KOO :             But  discrimination of a minority  ..  
OFFICIAL :  (interrupts )    Well ..  No .. actually .. I mean, you're missing
                          the point rather, bird.   Y'see, the Marxists are  ..
                          Okay, look at it this way.    You've got Kammerleg,  
                          margaretHilda ( thatcher),  theBlairwizard,  GenghisKhan , 
                         the non-Marxists, ?right
                        then there's everybody else   ..   who  are  . .  pretty much .. when all
                        said and done  ..  ( breaks off )
 KOO :            ..    Marxist  ?  
OFFICIAL :  You got it, Koo  !    Look, you were implicated long ago  ..   I mean
                          hanging around with such a  dangerous man   ! ? what were you thinking
                           ( pause )   CHEGWIN    !   Koo    ..   !  KEITH CHEGWIN  !  !   . .       ..              

                       Keith Chegwin          ( Cheggers Plays Pope / 
                                                                                               Naked Bungle )

Friday, 24 July 2015

                                                                      Art is all   /   all   is  Art

 !   Art        !Art         Art      . . Art   ..      Art !     ! 

   (pause )   ? What      (pause)     OK  ? !    (pause)                Yes    !  ... .

                 that all  ?  .      .  !Yes  ..    .       ..      OK    ! 

Wednesday, 22 July 2015

             a room    somewhere   within a series of rooms

KOO :   Heh  Doc  !  It's been a while
DOC :   Yes it has, Koo.   Sorry ! I've .. Just lately I've been running around like a headless                  . ..   !Hmmm   .. you're looking . ..
KOO:    Well ..   yes.    And you're not looking too bad,.   All things considered
DOC:    Like what ?  exactly
KOO:    I mean  considering all the considered people we know  think you look like sh ..
              well, like death warmed up, tbph .. ..  !hmm
DOC:   !Hmmm . ...    Look, Koo, let me give you the heads-up .. 
              I .. I've spent all this time ..  I've been busy on your site.
KOO:    Doc, I think you'll find I don't have a problem with my eyes.    Not any more.
DOC:    What  ?  laser treat.. .    Oh!,  I see   . .!hmmm     No,  your  SITE ! Koo 
KOO:    Hearing problems neither, Doc  ..
DOC:    No.   Of course not.  ..  No,  your  s i t e   K,    I've been visiting your site.
              25,679 . . ..   no !wait   ..   !hmmm  ..  .   make that  25, 680  times   !  
KOO:   Why ?
DOC:   Just call it part of being a caring professional.
KOO:   And that's it    ? ..   that's all you've been doing?  the past few years
DOC:   Caring professionally, K ,  is not necessarily a job to be rushed.
KOO:   I see. 


Monday, 20 July 2015

                                                  A-NUN / TROD

                                            tried   to   make   an  omelette
without  breaking  eggs.
                                            tried   to   serve    a    souffle'

without the paint of death.
                                           smashed a box of ten eggs

on the work surface..

             now                                                 having

eggs-is-ten-shell   crisis ;   an  eggs-is-ten-shell   crisis


                         His Papalness John-Paul-Sartre
                                                     Tim/or/Kim Davidson

Miln Ten-Yokes 
!to  my  Eks-linen                                    ennymi  Ekstol

               !  OY          HARRY     (POTTER)           HALLO

OY      HALLO        HALLO      ( HARRY)             HALLO

      HALLO       (AGAIN )     HALLO  . .... .     AAAAAGGGHHHHH !

                 Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallos

Lionem Stenky
O.K. MySentinel
Ten Smelin' Oyk
In My Skeleton

    QVC 1 5
                        stayed up very late
                                                       for Bowie documentary.
                                        ! damn that bloody knife !

             BBC 1 5
                                      !damn that shopping channel
        bought crap vid of dear  "Hector's House".
                                                                                        cracked Hector  !

   DCC 1 5  
        (i)                                stayed up very late
                                                                           for Polish preludes' fest.
                                                         !Damn that Chopin Channel

                DCC 1 5  
                  (ii)                                                         beavered away
                                                                                                  on a stream of mazurkas .
                Dam (n)  that  Chopin Channel !


                                 DCC 1 5
                              (iii )                          March :  
                                                             Ascent   to   a  funeral of beavers.
                                                             Split  that  chopin-chanel 

  taken  from :     Songs in the Quay of Knife :  15 ways to leaf your loofer / roofer

                             Stevie (Vim) Vendors                         Simon 'n Tenykel
                                                                                                               Mikel E. Sonnyt
  KLYEMIN TONES                                                                                     MIKEL BARRYMORE
               & NOTES                                                dREW-dREW-bARNEY-mcGREW
Lt. Eno Min'Keys


          All The Young Do's      (1)

Stayed up very late
                    doin' jewel fest .    Caught the bug.
                                       !damn that  Germ TV

 A T Y D   ( 11 )
                                     stayed  up  much  later
                                                                    doin'  jools  fest.   caught  the  Brugges.
                                                                         Damn  that  jools !Belgium  .

    all the Jung dudes
           Damn ! that Swiss headBanger's 
         on  Bowie / Mott The Hoople  rapport

                                    ALL THE OLD DON'TS (dolts)
                               ! don't do (the) 70's
                                                                                                             when watching  Germ TV
                                                                                          Damn! that  Spot-the-Hoople

                                                                                     ALL THE OLD DO'LTS (donts)
                                               Don't!  do  7(seven)  E's
                                                          while  watching  Germany
                                                                                                            damn that mottled oompah !

 synolt eikmen   /     sikment loyne  /        toye klinsmen     /    jurgen klinsman's volkswagen

                                                                                                       Mark Robins'  Batman

                                                                lord&lady sarah (Alec) fergusso'n

Friday, 17 July 2015

                                                                                A SENSE OF SIK 

        we tune in to         Pik TV 
               today    where       Sik Sense        
                                     is  screwing    with  us ;
                                                                                there       some   sykik's  side-kik :                       
I feel          he had  a  beautiful  smile             
                 !                                              in life .
 More than that He doesn't say,
                                                        what  his  smile  was  like  once  he'd  passed  away

KOLIN FRY / KOLIN SEYMENT  ;                                                                                  KOLEE ?YNNIT (ms.) ; 
                                                                     MONTELENY SIK ;    SIKMENT LOYNE

               K F C

         Kolin Fry 
                     know  his way around     death    and         life
                                                                    like the hand on his back .
                    so       to his dressing-room
                                                                                    post show  
   ! just  why? Can't   the fuck  find  his  way back                            .

   tense noymilk
                                                                                  Michael Aspel


Sunday, 12 July 2015

                 rambliings   of   a    MudMan

 ( where claire balding  and daviid cameron  go head2head at a new concept fest ;
                                                                                                             The Perennial Tit        )

     Well, The PT  concept  came about with the stark realisation that the over-saturation
of  festivals   hadn't dampened our lust for wanton excess, 
    butt ,  rather  ,   left us wantin'  lots more brollies   and wellies              and totties
        ! ?why not have a festival which ran  24/7  /  (52) 
No live art as such  tho' ambient backdrop would be provided by  The Stooge
( whichever member of  The Stooges  was available  and/or  not dead ) 
This ambience would accompany two random-celebrities
 (one from the Racing industry, the other from the Politcs industry ) 
     rambling with / at / to    each other
and anyone who might choose to tune in    on any  day    at any  time     on  Tit TV.
Sometimes just swathes of endless silence, other times roods of relentless prattle.
It presented as  Interviewer v Interviewee,  with the viewer always wholly unsure
which-was-which   and/or  who-was-who
                                                                       Either way:    Entertainment.

Sponsoring The PT :  Bet365   and   The Tit Gallery.

The concept's charm :   Dichotomy v Lobotomy 

While the ramblings could be improvisational and non-existent,
they could also - when they existed -  be both pre-determined and interminable.

The suckerPunch :  
When the two combattants - in this case horseyMegaface claire balding,
and currentPM daviid cameron, - go head2head ,  the audience get to decide 
which-of-the-two is hustling' the mostUtter horseshit ,
and who-of-the-two telling the mostLikely tails of Corruption.

And the audience get to bet on which candidate will be terminated

                Event .      Two players . . 
                                                          One  is  called    balding   .
                                                The  other  is  culled ,  balding     



Thursday, 9 July 2015


                  Tub(e) Strife       :     A  Tail of  Toe City

   as a momentousGreek once remarked in less-tormentous-times:                                 one tube strike doth not a standstill  make
           for  indeed    the    still  City
    so quickly proceed to a  movestill, 
                          even without its underground running.
     and that be testimony to the tenacity of these City-dwellers, whose never-say-die attitude saw some of them survive the Blitz ; 
others the 1966 world cup victory;
more the Double Olympics 
             and the cannonisation of the Anglo-Scot Andrew Murray 
( Murray stuffed into a canon at TheTowerOfMaskell
        and fired all the way back to bonnyScotland );
and still others, impressively, the traumatic events of  7/7.

And here they are again, against all odds,  beating the warm sun and cooling breeze coming off The River; route marching, cahoot walking, brisk enough early on with the sun in its infancy; then more quickly as work deadline approaches, soon slowing down with that  
Oh! fuckit anyway  positivity when they realise they're going to be late; speeding up again when dawns consequential guilt; 
slowing down finally toward mid-morning coffee and a well-earned sickie.
And, all the while this human tide rolls towards, over and away from the water, I seem to be set against it whichever way I deem to go.
If Humanity is desperately - well, at walking pace - disparately rather  escaping The Beast  . ..

                                                           anon / trad